im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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