me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
