Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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