I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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