i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize