omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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