i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
Randomize
