Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
