My pussy is not your playground.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize