The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Randomize
