"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
3pm strippers are depressing
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Randomize
