If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
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