if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
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