So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Randomize
