I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
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