I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
