How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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