none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
