I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
