Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
