I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
