That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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