Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
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