i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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