i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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