so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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