take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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