Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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