We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
