So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Randomize
