Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Randomize