Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
