this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
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