I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
