That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
no more duck duck goose at the bar
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
