Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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