went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize
