I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize
