Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
Randomize
