Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize