I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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