What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Randomize
