aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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