We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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