He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
this will be a night to untag.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
