you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
