I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
