so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
