ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
i need some magic done to my vagina
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Randomize
