Christians are straight up FREAKS
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Randomize
